Jōb Nikki

“My whole world”

I made you my whole world

The whole damn world

You told me you could handle all my pain

It got to where I couldn’t tell you anything

You didn’t want to hear

All the ways you were hurting me

Cutting me deeper with deceptions

Talking about me with your friends

I denied your scars

Because you longer felt mine

We both swallowed the pain

Until we burst into violence

I thought we were better

I knew we were better

In the end

Nothing matters

When all I had

Was in your home

Not the physical

But the spiritual

I just needed time

You had no more patience

I screamed in your ear

You told my dad I’m crazy

He agreed and walked away

You took my sharpest pain

You took my deepest secrets

Shared in pure confidence

You gave them to my enemies

Then splashed your face with confidence

That you did the right thing

You told me to get better

I asked if you would do the same

You shook your head

And told me not to worry about you

You ripped into my heart

With words full of hate

How can this be over

How can I begin

I don’t know where to go

When my world is all gone

On the other side of the world

You watch the sunset

I hide in a corner

I miss your face

That torturous face

That face that loved and hated me

That face that shaped my whole world